The Complaint Thread

Goddamnit. I cannot stand Eli Roth but now I kinda wanna see what happens.
I don't much care for him either, but I actually had a good time with Thanksgiving. It doesn't take itself too terribly seriously. Certainly skews more "Scream" than "Halloween", at least in terms of tone. There's certainly some gratuitous gross-out moments, but it's not too bad.

Alright, everyone should do their top five Christmas songs now. I'll start:

  1. Do They Know It's Christmas - Band Aid
  2. Happy Xmas - John Lennon
  3. Christmas Is All Around - Billy Mack (which is actually Bill Nighy)
  4. Fairytale of New York - The Pogues
  5. Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) - Darlene Love
For my money, the voice of Christmas isn't Mariah, it's firmly Darlene Love.

My #1 is "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas"- no specific version; it encapsulates everything that Christmas is to me- joyous, nostalgic, with a touch of bittersweet melancholy. After that, I feel like it varies year-to-year. Christmastime for the Jews has been getting a lot of airplay the last couple years since I started dating a Jew. Brownie points for the Bill Nighy shoutout, though; he's definitely the best part of that movie, and a vastly underrated actor.
 
THE PEANUTS THEME SONG IS NOT A CHRISTMAS SONG!!!!
and now back to your regular complaints
That Vince Guaraldi Christmas song in the Peanuts special is an eldritch tune created specifically to break your heart in a profound way that no words can explain. It's a musical equivalent of someone stepping on your grave.
 
That Vince Guaraldi Christmas song in the Peanuts special is an eldritch tune created specifically to break your heart in a profound way that no words can explain. It's a musical equivalent of someone stepping on your grave.
Didn't Arrested Development have that music (or a sound-alike) whenever George Michael was moping and once when an adult was?
 
I hate how Amazon will just send you someone else's return, with a packing sticker partially torn-off, the box beaten to hell and back, retaped shut, and then they have the nerve to tell you that you need to return it to get a replacement. I'm going to spend the time to make a stink about it and get a free replacement, fuck taking 30 minutes out of my day to drive to the UPS store because you sent me a used item.
 
Thanksgiving is tragically underrated. "I don't like Thanksgiving foods." Again, skill issue. I'm making mac & cheese on Thanksgiving because I like it. Cook what you like.
First thing I did when I moved out on my own was just make my own standards. Pizza for Christmas. Done Wings for Thanksgiving, why not?

I'm not the biggest fan of turkey, but it's mostly because people's turkeys suck. Deep fried turkey is a game changer. My dad also perfected the Weber turkey. One of my friends has a fantastic traditional turkey because she knows how to make it moist.

And why does it have to be turkey. I like rotisserie chicken. I like duck. People will shame you for this. Sheep traditionalism.

When I was married I did become anti-holiday because in Canada my ex-mother-in-law would weaponize it with guilt that we had to show up for Eve, then day, and then Canada added boxing day which I still don't even know what it's for.

And it was this 3-day guilt trip where if you didn't show up, your cousin's coworker's sister's dentist's girlfriends former roommate's horse groomer was going to be very upset and you would bring shame upon the entire House Atreidies. Except I mastered standing my ground, and my wife never liked it either, so we came up with our own boundaries. And then it turned out nobody gave a f*** if you showed up or not because no one else actually wanted to be there either. All this old world traditional generational trauma b*******. What really killed it for me was one of the last major Christmas days I had to waste there, which they want to do there for lunch through dinner into the night, everyone was just laying around on their phone or iPad. F*** off.

Anyway, I love Christmas again now that I'm detached from that family.
 
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When I was married I did become anti-holiday because in Canada my ex-mother-in-law would weaponize it with guilt that we had to show up for Eve, then day, and then Canada added boxing day which I still don't even know what it's for.
....

I'm not sure if it is the same in Canada however in Germany it's another Christmas day gathering too. Actually one wouldn't be gathering with the same people. Usually one would get together with close family one day Eve or day, another day it would be other other side in-laws etc, then the 3rd day extended family. Well however preferences pan out.
 
she knows how to make it moist
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Oh damn. Well, I absolutely despise the Thanksgiving holiday on all fronts, and while I don’t hate *all* the food, I do dislike most of it.
Mostly I just hate being trapped in a house with my family. I hate that people assume *everyone* wants to have sports on, I hate having to go around the table and “say what you are thankful for”, I despise performative “gratitude”, and I really really REALLY hate the fact that we are socially compelled to celebrate genocide and land theft. It’s fucking gross.

And yeah yeah yeah “just make it a fun family/friend holiday, it doesn’t have to be connected to thanksgiving!” Nah, fuck that. Thanksgiving is nasty “American empire” nonsense.
 
Oh damn. Well, I absolutely despise the Thanksgiving holiday on all fronts, and while I don’t hate *all* the food, I do dislike most of it.
Mostly I just hate being trapped in a house with my family. I hate that people assume *everyone* wants to have sports on,
Oh my god, as a midwesterner who doesn't watch sports this rings so true, and my birthday is on the 25th so often my birthday party was just people watching football and then eating dry turkey while my dad tells me to eat the canned cranberry, I don't want, get it away, oh no the memories are coming back! The disgusting smell of deviled eggs...it's supposed to be my special day, not this!
 
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