G.I. Joe Head Canon & Fanfic Filecards

So I know who my next card is, but I'm back to looking for requests - especially if they happen to be Sunbow or Marvel comics characters who haven't been made into Classified yet (bonus points if they are someone who can be fudged with an existing figure though).
 
Scoop? He was pretty active in the Sunbow cartoons.

What's a war journalist who can fight his way out of tough situations up to? I'd imagine the alt-world media has failed the public as much as our real life corporate sponsored shitbags, so he'd definitely be trying to get the truth out somehow. Working with Flint and the European contingent? Or investigating some fucked up shit in the Himalayans?
 
Mikey D said:
Scoop? He was pretty active in the Sunbow cartoons.

What's a war journalist who can fight his way out of tough situations up to? I'd imagine the alt-world media has failed the public as much as our real life corporate sponsored shitbags, so he'd definitely be trying to get the truth out somehow. Working with Flint and the European contingent? Or investigating some fucked up shit in the Himalayans?
Click to expand...

Scoop was actually the first guy I did who isn’t already in classified! His OG backstory is too perfect for this setting.
 
Code Name: Cadet Deming
File Name: Deming, Clarice
Primary Military Specialty: Undercover Espionage
Secondary Military Specialty: Interrogation
Birthplace: Westchester, New York
Rank: E-4 Equivalent

A rising star amongst the Crimson Guard, Deming has proven herself a valuable asset to the Paoli twins in their work representing the Lewis administration. A skilled negotiator, Deming has a strong grasp of what it takes to get things done, and is unafraid to bend the rules to accomplish her mission. She's shown a lack of fear in situations where ethical considerations may cow other agents, and has a real talent for getting answers from people who otherwise might prove intractable. The twins have suggested Deming be transferred under an alias to the Federal Bureau of Investigation to act as an agent for the administration and guide investigations toward conclusions beneficial to our cause. Keep an eye on this one - she's got a strong future in government.

"The twins have never been afraid to get their hands dirty. They were mercenaries in at least three wars of questionable origin and then went into the only thing dirtier than war: finance. And that's led them to have an eye for talent they can exploit. Deming was one of the first female Crimson Guard trainees before Lewis took office and rose to stardom as an attaché to Tomax and Xamot. Lewis has taken a liking to her as well, which strangely works in our favor - Deming works for the Paoli twins, not for Lewis, and her loyalty to them is very clear. Anywhere Lewis sends Deming, he sends a mole who is reporting to Tomax and Xamot first, and to Lewis a distant second."
 
Come on, Hasbro, give us the big man.

Code Name: Kwinn
File Name: Kwinn, Jesse
Primary Military Specialty: Special Ops Enforcer
Secondary Military Specialty: Tracker
Birthplace: Kotzebue, Alaska
Rank: N/A

Subject is an international mercenary who has worked with the CIA, KGB, and Mi-6. He is fluent in eight languages, including three Inuit dialects, and is an expert tracker, demolitionist, and assassin. He had a track record of working with mercenary companies like Cobra as well, though his last contract with Cobra left him blacklisted. The KGB also considers him an unreliable hired gun and will no longer work with him. He has most recently seen action in war zones in North Africa and the Middle East, and was hired for an expedition to the arctic circle by unknown benefactors. The Lewis administration considers him a person of interest but will not waste resources surveilling a man with no loyalty to any cause or nation.

"Kwinn wasn't my first choice for the arctic mission, but Snowjob went and got himself too much attention being a D-list celebrity ski instructor, Iceberg had already volunteered to lead that team into the Himalayas, and Frostbite couldn't do this thing alone. In the end, Snake Eyes vouched fro him. It's a weird thing, when Snake Eyes says you can trust someone. The mystical ninja mumbo jumbo is pure nonsense to me, but every mad dog of a man Snake Eyes has said was on our side has turned out to be a big damned hero, and he trusts Kwinn. Says it's a matter of honor. And you know what? In a world where Lewis can be elected king, where terrible people do terrible things every hour of every minute of every day, if you meet someone who has a sense of honor in spite of it all... hell, maybe you really can trust him."
 
Code Name: Dr. Venom
File Name: Monev, Archibald
Primary Military Specialty: Mind Control Research
Secondary Military Specialty: Botany
Birthplace: Brooklyn, New York
Rank: N/A

The Lewis administration is proud to announce that Dr. Archibald Monev, a world-renowned medical researcher and leading scientist in the fields of pharmaceuticals and behavioral health, has joined our staff with the Department of Health and Human Services. Despite being a lightning rod for controversy in the past for his willingness to explore science with a courage and boldness his peers will not, we consider adding Monev's talents to this administration to be a win for all Americans. He is already hard at work developing a new biochemical that can be used to treat addiction, mental health challenges, and even help the average American focus on the work they need to do to accomplish their day. With the good doctor by our side, the Lewis administration believes we can truly help Americans live their best lives.

"Look, Mindbender is crazy, right? The guy fried his own brain. He's a dangerous psychopath but he has an excuse. Dr. Venom? VENOM? He's this way on purpose. He isn't the end result of some brainwave-manipulation device gone wrong. He just wants to control and manipulate and torture people because that's his life's goal. And he wants to get rich off it. Give me a head case with a few screws loose over an actual monster any day. And what he's doing for the Lewis administration right now... We've got Americans who think fluoride in the water is a government conspiracy and this guy wants to put stuff on the market that makes you even easier to manipulate... our guy on the inside found out he's testing it on Mole Rats and it's working frighteningly well..."
 
docsilence said:
Code Name: Cadet Deming
File Name: Deming, Clarice
Primary Military Specialty: Undercover Espionage
Secondary Military Specialty: Interrogation
Birthplace: Westchester, New York
Rank: E-4 Equivalent

A rising star amongst the Crimson Guard, Deming has proven herself a valuable asset to the Paoli twins in their work representing the Lewis administration. A skilled negotiator, Deming has a strong grasp of what it takes to get things done, and is unafraid to bend the rules to accomplish her mission. She's shown a lack of fear in situations where ethical considerations may cow other agents, and has a real talent for getting answers from people who otherwise might prove intractable. The twins have suggested Deming be transferred under an alias to the Federal Bureau of Investigation to act as an agent for the administration and guide investigations toward conclusions beneficial to our cause. Keep an eye on this one - she's got a strong future in government.

"The twins have never been afraid to get their hands dirty. They were mercenaries in at least three wars of questionable origin and then went into the only thing dirtier than war: finance. And that's led them to have an eye for talent they can exploit. Deming was one of the first female Crimson Guard trainees before Lewis took office and rose to stardom as an attaché to Tomax and Xamot. Lewis has taken a liking to her as well, which strangely works in our favor - Deming works for the Paoli twins, not for Lewis, and her loyalty to them is very clear. Anywhere Lewis sends Deming, he sends a mole who is reporting to Tomax and Xamot first, and to Lewis a distant second."
Click to expand...
I love that you named her. She didn't have a first name before right? And as usual, it all fits with how she was portrayed in the original medium, but I appreciate how you made her feel way more like a comic character than a cartoon one. The FBI thing is REALLY intriguing to me. Who is the director over there these days? Zanzibar? Oh oh, Overlord! And who is the commentary? Destro?
docsilence said:
Come on, Hasbro, give us the big man.

Code Name: Kwinn
File Name: Kwinn, Jesse
Primary Military Specialty: Special Ops Enforcer
Secondary Military Specialty: Tracker
Birthplace: Kotzebue, Alaska
Rank: N/A

Subject is an international mercenary who has worked with the CIA, KGB, and Mi-6. He is fluent in eight languages, including three Inuit dialects, and is an expert tracker, demolitionist, and assassin. He had a track record of working with mercenary companies like Cobra as well, though his last contract with Cobra left him blacklisted. The KGB also considers him an unreliable hired gun and will no longer work with him. He has most recently seen action in war zones in North Africa and the Middle East, and was hired for an expedition to the arctic circle by unknown benefactors. The Lewis administration considers him a person of interest but will not waste resources surveilling a man with no loyalty to any cause or nation.

"Kwinn wasn't my first choice for the arctic mission, but Snowjob went and got himself too much attention being a D-list celebrity ski instructor, Iceberg had already volunteered to lead that team into the Himalayas, and Frostbite couldn't do this thing alone. In the end, Snake Eyes vouched fro him. It's a weird thing, when Snake Eyes says you can trust someone. The mystical ninja mumbo jumbo is pure nonsense to me, but every mad dog of a man Snake Eyes has said was on our side has turned out to be a big damned hero, and he trusts Kwinn. Says it's a matter of honor. And you know what? In a world where Lewis can be elected king, where terrible people do terrible things every hour of every minute of every day, if you meet someone who has a sense of honor in spite of it all... hell, maybe you really can trust him."
Click to expand...
NICE first mention of Iceberg! Oh shit! heh.

Fantastic commentary though. I was never super hot on Kwinn originally but came to appreciate him more later on, especially after seeing how IDW portrayed him.... or Devil's Due, one of those. It was an interesting take, in a good way I mean, but got me to appreciate him overall a lot more, and I'd probably get his figure now. I also appreciate that he isn't like Snake Eyes, but in some deeper sense... he sorta is. Or maybe even the other side of the same coin in a way. I love reminding how much he's been around and how much action he's seen, but also how few agencies etc trust him, though I think it's important to notice which ones and take a guess at why.
docsilence said:
Code Name: Dr. Venom
File Name: Monev, Archibald
Primary Military Specialty: Mind Control Research
Secondary Military Specialty: Botany
Birthplace: Brooklyn, New York
Rank: N/A

The Lewis administration is proud to announce that Dr. Archibald Monev, a world-renowned medical researcher and leading scientist in the fields of pharmaceuticals and behavioral health, has joined our staff with the Department of Health and Human Services. Despite being a lightning rod for controversy in the past for his willingness to explore science with a courage and boldness his peers will not, we consider adding Monev's talents to this administration to be a win for all Americans. He is already hard at work developing a new biochemical that can be used to treat addiction, mental health challenges, and even help the average American focus on the work they need to do to accomplish their day. With the good doctor by our side, the Lewis administration believes we can truly help Americans live their best lives.

"Look, Mindbender is crazy, right? The guy fried his own brain. He's a dangerous psychopath but he has an excuse. Dr. Venom? VENOM? He's this way on purpose. He isn't the end result of some brainwave-manipulation device gone wrong. He just wants to control and manipulate and torture people because that's his life's goal. And he wants to get rich off it. Give me a head case with a few screws loose over an actual monster any day. And what he's doing for the Lewis administration right now... We've got Americans who think fluoride in the water is a government conspiracy and this guy wants to put stuff on the market that makes you even easier to manipulate... our guy on the inside found out he's testing it on Mole Rats and it's working frighteningly well..."
Click to expand...
First part, brilliant. So well done, but the second part is a perfect amount of icing on top of it. Not only is this piece of shit crazy and sadistic, he's also greedy on top of that. Really nice connecting him to the Mole Rats too. Plus Mindbender loves taking his shirt off, but this sick fuck... sometimes he's wearing only a lab coat.
 
Ru1977 said:
I love that you named her. She didn't have a first name before right? And as usual, it all fits with how she was portrayed in the original medium, but I appreciate how you made her feel way more like a comic character than a cartoon one. The FBI thing is REALLY intriguing to me. Who is the director over there these days? Zanzibar? Oh oh, Overlord! And who is the commentary? Destro?

NICE first mention of Iceberg! Oh shit! heh.

Fantastic commentary though. I was never super hot on Kwinn originally but came to appreciate him more later on, especially after seeing how IDW portrayed him.... or Devil's Due, one of those. It was an interesting take, in a good way I mean, but got me to appreciate him overall a lot more, and I'd probably get his figure now. I also appreciate that he isn't like Snake Eyes, but in some deeper sense... he sorta is. Or maybe even the other side of the same coin in a way. I love reminding how much he's been around and how much action he's seen, but also how few agencies etc trust him, though I think it's important to notice which ones and take a guess at why.

First part, brilliant. So well done, but the second part is a perfect amount of icing on top of it. Not only is this piece of shit crazy and sadistic, he's also greedy on top of that. Really nice connecting him to the Mole Rats too. Plus Mindbender loves taking his shirt off, but this sick fuck... sometimes he's wearing only a lab coat.
Click to expand...
As far as I can tell, Deming never had a first name, and I just looked at a few stills from the show and was like: she's a Clarice. She looks like a Clarice. (Now i gotta figure out who the director is for the FBI under Lewis.)

I was saving Iceberg flor closer to his release date but I may do him next. He's getting the job I should've given to Snowjob if I hadn't said Snowjob was giving ted talks and being slutty.

I think in a timeline where Snake Eyes doesn't have Tommy, Snake Eyes becomes someone like Kwinn and he'd recognize that. The right person at the right time put him on the right path. And maybe Snake Eyes can do that for Kwinn.

It was tough trying to differentiate Venom from Mindbender, but Mindbender really is another flavor of that famous Marvel panel of Sauron saying he doesn't want to cure cancer, he wants to turn people into dinosaurs, he's just fucking cuckoo bananas. Nothing about Venom says he's crazy, and evil but not crazy is far more evil than crazy and evil.
 
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